How to not mess up Valentine’s Day
Navigating the holiday can be tricky, whether you’re newly dating or a longtime couple.
Surveys show that 36 million couples exchanging boxes of chocolates and 189 million roses for Valentine’s Day. But when you’re in a new relationship, chocolates and roses are not always the right gift to give. “Valentine’s Day means different things to different people,” says Toni Coleman, a licensed clinical social worker in founding McLean, VA and www.consumer-mate.com, a relationship advice site. “Doing too much or too little when the other person does not feel the same way 14 could cause problems in a new relationship in February.”
If you do not know how to handle Valentine’s Day gift and dating etiquette, read on for tips for when you just meet someone, when you’ve been together for a few months and when you’re in a committed relationship.
When you just meet someone
Day Planning: It is unrealistic to expect a huge party at this stage of romantic part. “If you had a date or two is OK for one to say, ‘Hey, Valentine’s Day is coming, and even though we’ve only released a few times, I thought it would be fun to do something together, like go see a movie. “If the other person wants to do that, that’s fine,” says Coleman. However, if the other person and conjunctiva hems, you should go back and fix a date for another day. It could be something as simple as that person has already made plans, or maybe the other person is not ready to be with someone on Valentine’s Day since the day comes with a lot expectations.
Get a gift: What if you two do together that day – should bring a gift? “It’s good to give a little something,” said Coleman. For example, if you know your date of collection of things with pigs on them, giving him a pig fridge magnet says: “I am careful with what you love.” Similarly, if a guy said he loves reading novels by Stephen King, the last pick for him is nice, not a profession huge eternal love. Remember that you should never give a gift with the hope of receiving one in return. Be prepared for the fact that the other person may not have thought of you doing something, and make sure you can handle before you offer your gift.
When you’ve been dating a few months
Planning of the day: Sometimes you spend a few months with someone and you know: “I met The One.” Other times, things are going well, but could not say with certainty that you expect to spend the rest of your life with this person. However, if you’ve been dating a few months, it is reasonable to expect that you will make plans to do something for Valentine’s Day. Coleman suggested approaching the subject lightly: “You can say something like, ‘Valentine’s Day is in two weeks … do you pretend it does not exist or you want to do something? ”
How the person reacts to the idea of spending Valentine’s Day together is a good litmus test for a budding relationship. It can be an important opportunity for your beloved… or perceived as a fake, commercial holiday. Just another day on the calendar. If your opinions differ, try to compromise, out of respect for each other. “If your date says:” For me, Valentine’s Day has always been a bit hokey, but if it’s important for you, we’ll do something together, then that’s fine, “advises Coleman. But if he or she refuses to acknowledge a preference for spending the day together and refuse to budge from the wine-and-pink typical plan to celebrate the day and this couple has more to worry about what to do on February 14. Adds Coleman, “It’s about how you negotiate these things where you do not see eye to eye.”
Get a gift: No matter how steep your beloved makes you feel, give something meaningful, but not inappropriately extravagant. So give your tickets sports buff for both of you to attend a basketball game Big 10 would be wonderful; renting a skybox in the stadium and restaurant, it would be completely on top. In addition, give a gift the two of you can enjoy together – tickets for an event, a night together – can ensure more shared good times ahead.
When you are in an established relationship
Day Planning: A funny thing happens on the road to Valentine once you’ve been together a long time – people tend to take the focus away from him and treat him like any other day. Coleman says it’s important not to assume a relationship at this point and does not make an effort to do something special is a mistake. Take the opportunity to celebrate together. It need not be a candlelight dinner classic. Maybe it’ll go shopping together at local farmers’ market and set up a small picnic while watching a DVD of a good film you both missed. Anything that can make a night you can enjoy each other’s company will be a useful gesture.
Get a gift: Probably the biggest minefield where you have been dating each other for a while is whether or not to embark on Valentine’s Day, a popular time to highlight the issue. The expert advice is, do not succumb to the pressure unless you’re really feeling it. “If there is no doubt in your mind as to whether or not to propose appropriate, choose another day to ask this question,” says Coleman.
If you’re not there yet, a gift that shows how much you know everyone’s life can be wonderful. It can not be the most romantic thing, but underwear, silk, for a honey who always golf lessons cold or pre-paid for someone who has always wanted to learn the game can be a great way to reflect how in touch you are with each other.