There are ways you can return to that head-spinning feeling you get at the start of a relationship.
When love is new, it is difficult to imagine that it will not always – that the time might come when the question “What do you do tonight?” Could be achieved with a look of boredom. But the truth is that, as your electrical connection could be in the initial months, you will inevitably feel more comfortable with each other, which is a good thing. This feeling comfortable that indicates the couple moved in ” capture “phase of their relationship where the feelings of intimacy and deepen security.
But it is also the time when couples can slip into routines thrill of sinking Friday night. Falling into the cycle of repetition ‘nights date “that play like old reruns is an easy trap to fall into a couple. But recent research on how the brain changes when you’re in love suggests that the addition of novelty to your date nights keeps both of you feel the same excitement as when you first fell for each other.
“When we fall in love, part of the brain that is activated is the region that produces dopamine, a natural stimulant that produces feelings of enthusiasm, desire, motivation and joy,” said Dr. Helen Fisher , author of Why him? Why her? How to find and keep lasting love and Chief Scientific Advisor to Chemistry.com. Brain scans of couples who have recently fallen in love show that the reward systems where dopamine is produced are enabled.
And for new couples, the time is thus often characterized by intense feelings of joy and excitement. But these feelings can be maintained over the years? Fisher and his colleagues also scanned the brains of happy couples who have been together for over 25 years and found that reward systems of the brain were activated similarly when they were together. So what new couples could do to ensure that their feelings of love and enthusiasm for each other stay fresh over time?
1. Variety, variety, variety
A secret to keep your love life may add a little variety to your date nights. “Novelty drives up dopamine production in the brain,” said Fisher, “and gives you the same feelings associated with romantic love. In fact, do something that is new, dangerous or exciting increase levels of dopamine in the brain. “mix things is one of the easiest ways to keep a relationship exciting. So if you have a favorite sushi place, it is still OK to have dinner there… just not every Friday night.
“It is important to share your favorite places with your partner but do not go the same places repeatedly. Set new things to do – a museum, a picnic, a bike ride in a new part of town “suggests Fisher. Couples can prepare a checklist of nightlife and the date that is new for two people, such as tango lessons, ice skating, visiting an art gallery or attend a conference at a local college or library. Even mix things up in a modest way – like taking a new road or making plans with new friends – creates an air of novelty-night date.
2. Alternately, plan your date nights
Another way to keep monotony at bay, Fisher suggests, is to turn planning dates. If any of you still planning the dates, it is easier to be lulled into a routine. When it’s your turn to plan this day and night, think of ways large and small weaving the unexpected in your party. If you usually drive to a restaurant, try to walk somewhere over the place. If you have a movie night outside the norm, check your local listings for plays and concerts. If you stay inside and watch movies rented is your appointment to date, invite friends to play games or take turns to find new recipes to cook and enjoy together.
3. Go out without a plan
In the beginning of a relationship dizzy, everything feels like an adventure as you discover the world of your new partner – their friends, favorite places, the most beloved books and movies. unexpected date nights can help couples to foster this attitude of adventure throughout their relationship. ‘Head through the door without a plan, “said Fisher,” and see where the night takes you. ” Start by heading to a new neighborhood and walking, which might lead to dinner at a restaurant or knew you existed. Often, our most fun and memorable evenings were born spontaneous and unexpected choice.
4. Go where no man has been before … or at least none of you
It is natural to take your new love to all your favorite places and vice versa. But for at least one of you, these places will not be met in the novelty associated with the production of dopamine. After visiting your mutual meeting places, discover cool places together. Check restaurant reviews and try this new Thai place. Hiking along a trail that is new to you both. Find a guide for your city and read it together, scanning adventure for both of you to take. Remember, keep new, fresh – and keep the excitement of being in love alive!